What i live for
by ninjaishh
Summary: Mikan is highly depressed. will that lead too a new found love? Sorry for her going from sad to happy. it freaked me out too xD


**Disclaimer;;** if I own Gakuen alice, it would be the worst anime/manga ever. So fortunetley its not. So I don't own it :D

Note.: the pomeish thing in italics without quotes and in bold **is** made by me. I like writing poems so I just thought this would fit. It **is** mine. So there.

I originally thought this oneshot for a NejiTen Fic but then I decided that it would fit NatsuMi better. :

'_where is that baka?'_

Natsume was started to get annoyed looking for the little girl. She wasn't at dinner nor lunch and forget about breakfast. He knocked at her dorm but nobody answered.

He went to the Northern Forest.

_Nobody_

He went to Hotaru's Lab

_Nobody_

He went to Central town.

_Still nobody_

'_Damn, damn it all'_

Then it occurred to him. Who knew that the genius Natsume couldn't figure something out as easy as this before three tries. (Natsume: -Bashes authors head- Me: OWwww. Natsume: That's what you get for making me stupid)

_Sakura tree. _

He saw a figure there.

He took a step closer. He saw a Tear filled honey haired Beauty sitting there writing something that seemed like a journal. He walked to the other side of the tree without her noticing him. She then recited something that surprised his **greatly.** And I mean **greatly.**

" _**why live when there is nothing to live for.**_

_**why breathe when i always feel like suffocating**_

_**why love when you know they will never like you back**_

_**why smile when there is nothing to smile for**_

_**why laugh when there is nothing funny**_

_**why leave your life hanging on a thread**_

_**when you can just let go**_

_**to make it all easier.**_

_**i guess i live to watch people's happiness **_

_**i guess i live to suffer **_

_**when the world turns against you**_

_**why...**_

_**why not...**_

_**just die. **_

_**its not like anyone would care..**_

_**or even notice."**_

"Oi little girl, whats wrong?" Mikan twitched at the voice for, she, recognized the voice. She quickly slammed the book shut and sat on top of it.

"Oh…uh… HI NATSUME" Mikan tried to smile. And she did fake one. She was even surprised she could even lift the corners of her mouth like that. Even if it was fake.

"Don't play with me like that. I know that's fake. Now are you gonna tell me or not?"

Mikan felt silent. She stared at the Night sky for awhile. Natsume being Natsume was patient. If it was anybody else they would have killed her for not telling.

"I'll wait all night if I have to-" Before he could finish, he could feel a tear drop on his arm. He looked up at Mikan and stood up.

"Mikan whats wrong?"

Mikan being Mikan and being to occupied didn't notice the sudden change in mood.

"Natsume"

"Hm?"

"Ojii-chan.. he…" Natsume waitied her to finish but nothing happened…

"He…" She started sobbing **Maniacally **and ran into Natsumes arms, sobbing in his chest. He sat down and dragged the girl with him. He firmly but not hurting the girl, wrapped his arms around her with one hand and the other stroking her long Honey hair which by that time, she put it down. Being 16 and all. Mikan was a little surprised at first but just continued crying.

"So he…?"

"Died…" Mikan murmered in a low voice.

"Don't worry I'll be here for you." AND finally Mikan noticed the change in his attitude. (slow…slow girl)

"Umm… sudden change of attitude?"

'_Sudden?!; _Natsume mentally kicked himself for loving such a stupid girl, but of course, that was one of the reasons he loved her (twitch twitch… too fluffy.)

"Fine." He pushed her off him and she pouted.

"HEY! Natsume tha-" She was shutted ( not a word people) up with a warm kiss. Her Eyes widened as she stared at the fire caster, alarmed. But soon she returned the kiss. When they broke apart, when oxygen was **highly** needed…

"Did you just…?"

He embraced her once again and stroked her hair once again.

"Urusai and Sleep."

She obliged happily and soon slept like a pig on Natsumes chest.

"Don't drool on my shirt moron" What he didn't know was that she was still awake. Just pretending to sleep while in her "Loves" arms. She was about to reply with a pout when suddenly he said things that surprised her.

" I live for you, Mikan

I breathe when I feel like suffocating because each and everyday I'll see you and your smile.

I know you'll never return those feeling I have for you but I'll keep loving you.

I smile (smirk –cough) for you.

I laugh (not really but I just wanted it to fit my poem) –cough inside-cough- because you make stupid things seem funny.

I leave my life on a thread and not let go because I want to be with you each and everyday till I can't hold on any longer." Natsume stared at the sky and sighed.

"Really?" When Mikan heard all that she couldn't help but smile. Natsume was shocked

"YOU'VE BEEN AWAKE AND NEVER TOLD ME?" Natsume's face starting to be a tomato.

He was going to scream his lungs out but before that happened…

Warm lips met his.

When they broke apart…

"I love you Natsume" Mikan said with a little giggling.

"Hn.. I love you too Polka dots." Mikan's cheeked poofed up and pouted.

"Mikan"

"Huh…?"

"You WANT me to call you polka dots?"

"no.."

"That's what I thought." Mikan giggled and plopped back down to Natsume's chest and slept.

Behind the bushes…

'_Hehe I'll be rich.' _

Take a guess who that could be.

**The end. **

I'll have you imagine the rest. :

Natsume: -runs after Sharon like a maniac-

Sharon: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MIKAN HELP ME

NAtsume: This is what you get for doing that to me

Sharon: WELL I HAVE THE POWER!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Mikan: NAtsume! Stop. And please review. : flame higly accepted.

NAtsume: because this is a crappy story

Sharon: -tear-


End file.
